Not sure if you have noticed, but I have been absent from the blog for the last few weeks. Forgive me as I am drowning among the chaos that I call “life”. Things are all sorts of messy, and the controller in me doesn’t like “messy”.
It is easy to sit down on my comfy couch and write up a blog when things are going well. I don’t mind opening a window into my world for others to see when life is clear, exciting, and predictable. But, I have to admit to you, when things are not going so smoothly; that is when it is hard to be transparent. Words are difficult to tap out on a key board when you have none to write. When your mind is so full of life’s “ifs, ands and buts”, the ability to articulate you’re experience to others is nearly impossible because the future is unclear to the one living it.
Currently we are between homes. Homeless. Technically, yes. Literally, not.so.much. We own a home still. Our old one. But we are leasing it to the new owners until closing is final. We were scheduled to close on May 24, but the Monday before a massive tornado struck Moore, Oklahoma; declaring Oklahoma County (the county we live in) a “disaster area”. Our house has remained unharmed through every tornado that has passed through this season, (Praise God) but because of the extensive amount of severe weather; issue after issue has caused delay after delay. Due to the disaster area being declared we have had to halt closing on our home because lenders are not closing in the county without additional inspections and appraisals. I get it. Really, I do. They want to make sure the house is standing if they are going to lend money to purchase it. But, my understanding doesn’t make it less of a headache. So, since we had already moved out, made repairs, cleaned until our fingertips bled AND the closing date is STILL pending (for who know’s how long) we are leasing our home to the new owners. Basically, we are all at the mercy of the bank… and it’s not a fun position to be in. Boo.
The house we were going to purchase in this “would have been seamless process of back-to-back-closings” has also fallen through. Our new house was empty, the current owners home in which she lived in was damaged in the Moore tornado, causing confusion and chaos to ensue. Without going into too much detail the purchase of that home fell through AFTER we had moved out of our current home and put all of our belongings in storage (for what we thought would be 3-4 days…).
So. Here I sit. Attending a summer camp that my husband was scheduled to sing at, with my 3 children; homeless. I had one pair of shoes, and a few random clothes from the dryer, but now we are going to be displaced for a good month or two. (Luckily Old Navy had a SALE this weekend!)
Thankfully the kids think the whole ordeal is a thrilling adventure of “where will we be next week”… and they don’t see Mom and Dad biting their nails and pulling out their hair behind the scenes.
And, before y’all feel too sorry for me, you must know that we are blessed to have BOTH sides of family close in vicinity and very capable of hosting us for weeks at a time if the need arises!! We will be having great opportunity for “quality time” this summer, ha. While we are “homeless”, we have many “homes” welcomed to us.
God has proven Himself faithful through the entire scenario, and I am truly thankful that His mercies are new everyday and His provisions are greater than my own. This is one of those times in life where we are depending on our faith in an entire new way. An unclear future is a scary thing. Even if it’s just an unknown address. As a human, and especially as a woman, I long for security, and not having that leaves a part of me vulnerable and fragile; FULLY relying on HIM.
Until our home closes we are taking a break to rest our minds from the emotionally-draining-second guessing-expensive-and-ever-so-tidious “hunting” process, and praying God will prepare the path that we are to take.
In the mean time, bear with me. I may be sporadic, but I will get back to normal life soon, and normal blogging.
Thanks for reading friends.